Sunday, February 9, 2020

Chemo

Nausea, Constipation and just generally feeling yucky

With constipation usually leading to you know what

In order to break the grip of the constipation!

I think that pretty much sums up

My initial experience with chemotherapy and immunotherapy.

Each stage of this cancer journey

Has certainly brought it's own challenges

And chemo has been no exception:(

It's been rough

And has given me huge respect

For the millions who have experienced it before me

And the millions who are in the thick of this journey with me.

I had my first chemo and immunotherapy treatment

On January 31st

And finally got enough of a respite to write this blog today

Though I'm feeling pretty nauseous while writing it:(

It will happen every three weeks

The next treatment on February 21st.

Every 3-4 treatment cycles

I will have a CT scan to evaluate

The effectiveness or non-effectiveness of the treatment

To see if the "Hail Mary"

Has been miraculously caught or dropped!

Incredibly, I've not had any fluid accumulation

In my left lung since I stopped the pancreatic enzymes

And had the PleurX catheter removed

Which has been a wonderful elimination of one "inconvenience"

Through this stage of the journey

Not needing to go to the ER weekly to have my lung drained.

One thing that has become very prevalent in my thinking

Being very aware that I am full of cancer

And need a miracle to see it's elimination or reduction

Is a constant pondering of death and what comes after

This isn't being morbid

It's just my dominant reality.

Actually, it's all of our reality

Not knowing when any of us will die

Whether expected or unexpected.

The book of Ecclesiastes in the Bible

Actually encourages this thinking

In order that our Living

Might be all that it can be.

What happens at the moment of death?

Being thinking, feeling beings

Who obviously are more than just matter

It is impossibly incredulous to think that death is just the end

So...

What happens at the moment of death?

I'm going to leave you with that question at this time

Coming back
(Nausea allowing)

To share my ponderings

Along with other questions
(and my ponderings)

That I've been asked by many people

As I tread this cancer journey

Thanks again for sharing this journey with me

You all are a massive blessing and encouragement!

Much love and appreciation,

Dave

14 comments:

  1. You are in my prayers and thoughts. Be strong.

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  2. Thanks for sharing with us, Dave. We love you and are here for you.

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  3. So grateful for you communicating so openly, Dave. By doing so, you encourage others to share their challenges and give them strength by sharing yours. Thank You.

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  4. Thank you, Dave, for your vulnerability in sharing your thoughts. You have an army of prayer warriors along side and your openness helps us know how to pray. This verse popped up in my email and I thought I would share:

    Then when you call, the LORD will answer. “Yes, I am here,” he will quickly reply.

    Isaiah 58:9 (NLT)

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  5. We are grateful beyond words that you make the time and put in the effort to share your journey with us Dave. We love you. We love you all. J & J

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  6. We love you dave! Thank you for sharing your journey with us all. The Lord bless you. From darrell and Harley

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  7. Thanks for taking us on this journey with you. There’s great wisdom here.

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  8. Dave!
    You are so loved by many and are God’s beloved child. I ask Father to make His presence through the Spirit, because of Jesus’ blood sacrifice and resurrection, to flood you and your family. May you tangibly feel His glory shower!!! XO

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  9. We avoid thinking about our mortality and I am grateful you are helping us to face it. Keep it coming. Laurie and I pray for you and your family every morning together.

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  10. Hey Dave, I’ve always been happy that you are sharing this Journey with all of us.
    I think it’s important.
    Not too long ago you mentioned “Hail Marry” and that maybe you have a 10% chance. I thought strongly since then that you are one of those guys of the 10%.
    It’s a strong feeling I have.
    I think about you a lot and hope the best.
    Thank you Dave
    Hang in there my friend.
    John H

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  11. Even in this time you are giving. It is a blessing to hear your ponderings Dave. You are being pressed and what is given here is beautiful.

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  12. I appreciate your honesty and wisdom. Thank you for sharing your ponderings and thoughts...we all need to be more aware of our living and precious life here on earth.
    You are in my prayers .Blessings ! Gud välsigne Dig!

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